Once a week, we answer a question that has been submitted by one of our community members, right here on the blog. This week we heard from Andy, who has been single for a while and is hoping to get back into the dating game and attract love into his life.
Q - Hi, Andy here. I went through a bad divorce a few years ago and have been single ever since. It took me a long time to get over my ex-wife and I wasn’t interested in dating for a few years, but now I’m ready to move on and get back out there. The problem is, I have no idea how. My mates have told me to get on some dating websites but I’m not sure. I’m not very confident so I’m rubbish at talking to women. Do you have any advice? Thanks!
A - Hi Andy,
It’s so lovely to hear from you. Thank you for submitting a question about love from a man’s point of view; those are rare! Your situation is, unfortunately, a common one. Many people who experience bad breakups find it hard to move on and find love again, and can be single for a long time. However, it’s great that you feel like you’re ready to get back out there and meet somebody. It’s natural to be nervous and unsure of how to attract love back into your life, but we have a few tips to make it a little easier for you. Read on to find out some of the best and easiest ways to attract love into your life.
Love yourself first
It may sound like a cliché, but they are popular for a reason; they’re always true. If you want to attract love into your life, you have to love yourself first. If you feel unattractive and unlovable, that is the vibe that you will give out to others, too. You are the most important person in your life, so it’s important that you love yourself. People think that loving themselves is conceited or vain, but this isn’t true. Simply knowing your own worth and having respect and love for yourself is healthy. The way you treat yourself sets the bar for how everyone else should treat you too.
If you’re feeling low on confidence, show yourself some self-care. Treat yourself to a new haircut and a few new clothes that make you feel good when you’re wearing them. It’s surprising how much confidence just a little change can make. Another way to increase your confidence is by repeating some positive affirmations to yourself. Positive affirmations are a great way to practice the Law of Attraction, which is the idea that your thoughts affect what happens in your life. Give it a try today.
Know what you are looking for
What is your ideal partner like? Do you have a type? Do you like people with specific interests? When looking for love, it’s a good idea to know exactly what you are looking for. I’m not talking about looks; though we all have certain preferences when it comes to who we find attractive, our partners often surprise us by not being at all what we imagined. However, what’s important is their personality, and how compatible it is to yours.
Though it’s true that sometimes opposites attract, it’s important that you have at least a few things in common with your potential love interest. Make a list of your personality traits and your interests, and then make a list of what you would like your significant other to have. Now you know what you’re looking for, you can begin your search!
Put yourself out there
Though I tend to agree that great love often finds you when you’re least expecting it, I also think that you have to be available and ready for love to find you. If you want to attract love, you need to be visible and easy to find. That means putting yourself out there.
Online dating sites and apps have become increasingly popular over the last decade or so. They’re not for everybody, but many people have found love and happiness through using them. The ‘matching’ system that most use is a good way to find people with similar interests to you, and this common ground helps get conversations started. Even if nothing happens in real life, at least using an app will give you some good practice at talking to people, and will get you back into the game.
If you’re not interested in online dating, focus on opportunities to meet new people in real life. Do you have a hobby that causes you to meet people? If not, why not take one up? Not only will it help you meet new people, it will automatically give you an interesting topic for conversation.
Have a Love Tarot Card Reading
If you’re unsure about what’s in store in your romantic life, a Love Tarot Card reading could help shed some light and give you a little insight into what you can expect. Maybe a new partner is just around the corner, and you just need a little encouragement to go and find them. A Love Tarot reading can answer any questions you have, and give you the knowledge and confidence you need to attract love into your life.